---------- ---------- Hey guys, it's been awhile but hold your horses because guys... it happened. I FINALLY HAVE A NEW LAPTOP!! Expect big things from this cause boy does my mind jump all over the place nowadays. Late night (well i guess early morning) blogging may slowly become my new thing... but I also have plans to start vlogging again and I feel like that could be something really cool maybe? I'm starting to learn to love myself again. I know my last post had people a bit concerned for my mental and physical well being however I just had happened to let every last little negative aspect of my life affect me way more than it should have - for that I apologize. I'm still not at the definitive plateau of fitness I would like to be at but I'm definitely leaps and bounds ahead of where I started, to that I am excited for what the future has in store for me. Work is the usual, heaping smelly steaming piles of stressful bullshit with slight glimmers of happiness and joy to then be burned before my eyes by and even bigger pile of heaping smelly steaming stress and the vicious cycle goes on and on in an infinite loop - but I like it more than I hate it. Call me a glutton for punishment if you will but Id rather hate my job than not have one at all, am i right? I feel so disconnected, it's hard to get back into the swing of things and I dont know where to start, I used to write essay long journal entries and I developed a bit of a healthy following from them and you all seemed to genuinely like reading my thoughts and opinions and life stories... things are moving so fast and my life is going down all these random bumps and twists, turns, loops that it's hard to organize and develop a sound plan of what to tell you guys first. Maybe it's because it is 12:27 am but I had such fatigue thinking of where to start with this. On a rather positive note I think my Pansexuality has been fully realized. I've 100% come to terms with the fact that I dont care about anyone's opinion on that matter and gladly welcome those who wish to be educated. This is a giant step for me, for a long time I just let people have their opinions without truly giving my own self the identity that I wanted, that I felt I deserved. My life is in my own terms, no one can tell me who to be, how to act or who to love - and I fucking love that! I should likely be going to bed at this present moment, my back's killing me and I'm struggling to keep my head from slamming into the keyboard. Working in 10 hours, so id like to catch up on some sleep. Have a good one guys and I'll see you guys with a new entry shortly!! -Michael