It's been awhile, yes I get it. School being my excuse like always, but you should note that i have one week left of classes So there's that.

I'm tired. Tired of constantly fighting to prove myself and it's so frustrating, I just wish that everything would fall right into place instead of having to work my hands to the bone in order to get to where I want to be. I'm over it. I've had to grow up since I've been - what? - 13 years of age.

It's not that i enjoy knowing that I've worked hard and earned what i've worked hard  for, it's just that I'd rather take a break from all the stressful 'overthinking' that I've been doing and just the let chips 'fall as they may' so to speak.

anyways I have like three assignments on the go, so i should probably get on that... here marks the end of my social life for about a week and a half (exams).

-Michael

Labels: awhile, been, it's, let, me, michaelchristopher, rant

Sounds so soulful don't you agree
I invented swag
Poppin bottles putting supermodels in the cab
Proof :I guess I got my swagger back
Truth: new watch alert, Hublot's
Or the big face Rollie I got two of those
Arm out the window through the city I maneuver slow
Cock back, snap back
See me cut through the holes
The Throne - Otis

Well, here we are. At the pivotal moment in my life where I have chosen to take a stand and put my big boy shoes on. Needless to say I have chosen to push negative aspects of my life out of it, frankly it is turning me into a stronger person. This summer has opened my eyes drastically and has allowed me to mature, and I didn't even think it was possible.

Obviously if you've been a follower of my blog (undoubtedly there's not many left) you will have noticed the swift decay of my blog initiative, however, i now feel as though I have things to blog about again. High school is all the same, that's why i never really had much to talk about, my life has officially started, and the nonsense is thrown out the door.

I have one last thing to do before I start college, than i will official be ready to grow up, it's been a long time coming, but I like this new me, I like him a lot.

I mean, why should I have to sit around and appease the needs of others? In the longrun, I'm not benefiting myself, and in the end, I should respect myself. So to the people who expect me to be what they want, I say goodbye. If I'm not the person you want me to be, than why am i bothering with you - really, it's nonsense. To those of you who see the real me and appreciate it, I thank you. Your love and respect has allowed me to understand who and where I need to be in my life. And I finally get it.

I'm not going to run around like a chicken with it's head cut off, I'm manning up, and it's about time I grabbed life by the balls, because I'm no longer going to settle.

I am Myself, I will always be myself, if that isn't good enough for you; sayonara.

On a brighter note, I am looking forward to college, I'm not scared and I want to experience everything it has to offer. Because frankly, my summer was depressing to say the least, no good really came out of it and I've been forced to mask emotions that i don't want to anymore, and I wont.

Oh, and I'm officially under 200 lbs again! I have not been this skinny since the start of grade ten, the highest I got was 240 lbs, and to finally weigh 195lbs, i feel like I have accomplished something. I worked so hard for it, its a little depressing still being shot down and still being called 'fat' or 'chubby' but really it doesn't bother me as much as it used to. Whats sad is I used to be too afraid to take my shirt off in front of some friends that I considered friends, horrible to think that people you thought cared about your feelings had no problems poking at your insecurities. But i have to understand, some people aren't ready for life changes, and some people want to grasp what little youth they have left. However, it's not me anymore.

Sure, I can enjoy parties and drinking, but that doesn't mean that I have to treat life like a joke, reality hit me hard - I need to grow up and stop taking things so seriously, life changes, friends change and people change. And I need to make a few changes in all three aspects. I know who my real friends are, and I love them. As far as I am concerned I will have a long lasting relationship with them, and i can only hope they feel the same way.

Anyways I'm tired, gonna go rest a bit,
thanks for reading :)

Anjulie - Brand New Bitch

Labels: a, bold, good, is, look, me, michaelchristopher, on

OH OH OH BABY! Guess who's finally under 200lbs? MEE ME ME!!!!!

Okay, I understand that was a little too much excitement... but hey, understandable I think.

I haven't felt this great about myself since well... it's been quite a few years to say the least. But then I was a rail, at least now I have some good muscle definition, and am proud to show it off.

Summer has been going superbly well, although yesterday involved me accidentally getting elbowed in the nose and lip... needless to say I have a bruised cartilage and a fat lip... but these things happen when you are wrestling with your brother in the living room after your dad says to take it easy. So in a sense, I kind of feel like it was just desserts aha.

I have to do my Writ testing for Fanshawe soon, the last day is August 18th, so i gotta step it up, plus I have to do an online Health and Safety Course.. which I kind of feel like I've been over this with you guys before? Yes? No?

Anyways, my dad's firing up the grill, so I gotta go, talk to you all later.
Mike

Labels: feel, like, make, me, michaelchristopher, you